Well Folks, I do realize it has been a while since my initial post. I have not forgotten about you, nor have I abandoned this tiny little part of the grand cyberworld. :) Quite the contrary actually. I have decided to move my blog to this website, so that those who truly do want to "follow" can, & those who don't, won't be bombarded w/constant "notes" on my FB page.
I do apologize for such a delay in giving you the "next page" & it is my genuine wish that I will be able to keep this blog current & maintain a daily (if not, very close to daily) post. Bear with me on this as there often doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day - on MOST days.
I am anticipating some sort of normalcy & routine to grab my life very soon. I am taking the appropriate actions to make that happen. I expect this routine to begin w/in a few short weeks. In the meantime, please bear with me. :)
Well, there is my apologies & my wish.
Now, for the updates.
Since I last posted, I have taken a few major steps to begin this journey of mine & create my world & make my life what *I* want it to be!
I can't disclose the biggest step as of yet, but it was a big step.
What the result will be - well, truthfully, I am not sure.
Only time will tell & in the meantime, I continue to pray & ask this amazing God of ours for mercy, grace & justice. I am trusting that *HE* will have His hands in every aspect & will do what is best for all. HE is a good God & I've got to continue trusting that.
Aside from that, I have some major decisions to make very soon.
Not anything dramatic or traumatic - just... decisions... life decisions.
The blessing is that I DO have options. I am not 'stuck' in any one place or taking any one road.
That is indeed a blessing.
On the flip side, w/options comes the pressure of having to make the best, most responsible decision - not just for me, but for my daughter as well.
And Boy! It is pressure.
BUT, that pressure is an honor that I humbly accept - as her mother.
I may spend lots of time on my knees, asking God for guidance & to please "show me" & correct me, but my prayers always end the same...
W/me on my knees, looking up to the heavens, w/tears in my eyes, saying "Thank you. Thank you so much. I don't know why you chose me to love her, nurture her, protect her & raise her, but THANK YOU JESUS! I am doing my best, God. I really am. Help me do better! And... THANK YOU. I love you."
So, these decisions will soon be standing directly in front of me, looking me square in the eye & saying, "What are you gonna do? Huh?"
A great part of these choices to be made are going to be based on the results of some things (the ones I can't really talk about yet).
For now, I wait. Patiently. Anxiously. Quietly. Just... wait.
Part of the reason that so much time has elapsed between my first post, moving the blog to this website & the next post is b/c I was a bit under the weather, & then my sweet sweet baby took ill for a few days after I did. It was a scary time for me as "Mommy" but she is doing so much better & seems to be back to her happy, healthy self! :)
There is alot going on in my life at the present & I can't really inform you of it all, but trust - it is a doozie! BUT... the stories will be told... eventually... when it is necessary & appropriate.
That time just isn't now.
Anyways, I have also seen a doctor, have been recommended to a couple of other doctors & well, frankly... I don't know how I feel about it all. Doctors, doctors, doctors & yet still no answers. Hmmm... I don't know if this is the route I want to go anymore.
I think I may try something very different - if it doesn't work, I won't be any worse off then I am now. And if it does... well... then it can only get better & better!
I am feeling a lifestyle change. I really am.
There is an itch to make some drastic changes that I have never really felt before.
There is an ache deep in my bones to change the way that I live.
I am moving slowly to make sure that I am making clear, well thought out decisions that are best for both my daughter & I.
The first step is to get a consultation for acupuncture & move into that form of "treatment" before I let anyone decide to do any other surgery on me or the likes.
I am in search of a place & person that feels "right" & I'm hoping to find that very soon.
Well Folks, I guess I have said enough for this post.
Hope this helps you to feel "caught up" - at least for the moment!
Create your world! ;)
Until next time...
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